Monday, August 17, 2009

Blurting things out


Most of what I write is stream-of-consciousness. Not much preparation or research or proofreading (if any.) I certainly value these things but I'm often really sick or really tired or really pressed for time. Sometimes I decide saying something is better than saying nothing at all. I'm probably wrong, since nothing I write is widely read or very much praised. It probably is better to only present one's best work or at least what one would consider acceptable after at least a cursory proofread. However, since no one is being forced to look at anything I've done, I'm working on shedding my guilt over just blurting out what is in my head and clicking the button to post. There are so many times when I am only half conscious, or struggling with pain or something like blurred vision. If I waited until I felt well enough to do things The Right Way--I would never do anything at all. My entire life has been one of forced compromise with a nasty illness and a nasty social structure which punishes sick people who must rely on public assistance to survive. When I remind myself of that, I stop feeling so sorry for anyone who doesn't like what I produce online...you know, they could just avert their eyes...

I wish I did have time and energy to produce pieces of careful writing. I wish I had time, energy, strength, vitality, ability, money, etc. for all kinds of things!

I'll contact my Fairy Godmother as soon as possible. In the meantime, I am sick to death of not being appreciated enough. Whether I deserve appreciation is another matter!

2 comments:

Zuzana said...

Your writing is lovely and very candid. I appreciate everything you have to say. And I pity those who did you wrong, as they have missed out on great friendship.
I am so sorry that your life is not easy and that you struggle with issues unknown to most of us. I think you are one of those unspoken heroes in my eyes.;))

Beep said...

You are such a sweet person. I hope life is rewarding you properly :) (((hugs)))

About Me

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I've travelled the distance from an Ivy League college to decades of enforced poverty--because I've needed to qualify for government health care in the U.S., since being diagnosed with lupus at the age of 23. I have a personal blog at http://beepbeep.livejournal.com that I've had so long I'm probably stuck with :) My other blogs are here on blogger...