Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Imagine the proposal and the beautiful ring on Christmas Eve...or...

keeping your self-respect. Not a hard choice for me (the self-respect, PLEASE) but I can't speak for anyone else.

Confession, though: I know so many happily married people who got engaged to be married during the holiday season. I admit to feeling a twinge of...something. I think about the bride dolls I saved from when I was little for the children I am not going to have. Wistful, maybe. That's a good word!

Anyway, I can't marry anyone. I can't risk ever possibly burdening them with my massive medical bills. If I'd been born in any one of numerous other first-world countries with truly national health care, my life might have been very different. No one can say whether or not it would be a better life, but at least it would have had a chance of fitting what I dreamed and planned rather than what half of my country, paranoid about "socialism", decided for me. So much for MY freedom...sigh.

Anyway, I do think that love is a million billion trillion times more important than a ring, and that telling lies in order to get a marriage proposal is just plain stupid. Whom would your man be marrying, then, the person you pretended to be? Do you plan to pretend for the rest of your life? Or do you think divorce court looks like a lot of fun? Stupid! My opinion FWIW. Sorry, "Rules Girls"...


MsDarkstar said...

I've had one real dating relationship in my life,(did not end in marriage), been married (and divorced) three times and fail to see what is so fantastic about being married (but know that is because I am now old and bitter...)

I think it's sick that women think they should/need to trick a man into marrying them. If you can't be yourself with someone you are allegedly going to spend the rest of your life with and still have them want to spend the rest of their life with you, you have no business getting married, IMHO.

Do I want a big, sparkly rock? Hell yeah. Do I want to have to get married to get it? Hell no. But I understand that societally speaking, that makes me a huge freak.

Beep said...

I forgot, but I guess I'm in the "old and bitter" category, too! Before, I was "young and clueless" ! Amazing how these transitions occur!

I like the "Diamonds Are Forever" song from the James Bond movie. And yes, a beautiful clear diamond solitare is so lovely that I'll be sure and get myself one if I ever win Lotto. But I guess I join you in the Freak Dept. because I do not have the resources or the energy or the motivation to be tall (I can't wear spike heels any more and the Height Fairy was on break when I was born), thin (see drug prednisone; see disease lupus), blonde (fine weak thin chemotherapied dark hair won't GO there), or pretending to be someone I'm not 24/7 (that is a really hard acting job and if I'm going to work that hard someone had better donate some money to a charity in my name.) Freaks Unite.

Protege said...

I am sorry that you feel sometimes bit down when it comes to the turns that your life took...
I agree with you though that love is more important that a ring.

Beep said...

Protoge you brighten everyone's day when you visit; especially mine! Thank you :) I know you probably don't celebrate USA Thanksgiving but have a happy one anyway!

Protege said...

Dear Beep, I just read your comment that you left at Tom's place. You are so very kind.;)) You have a huge heart.;)
Yes indeed, sometimes I am down too, even if I try not to let myself be down for too long.;) I was hoping to have a visitor over the holidays who will not be arriving after all and that got to me just a bit.;)
But, I usually bounce back quiet fast.;)
Have a wonderful Holiday Season my dear friend and thank you for such kind and warm words.;)

Beep said...

Protege I hope you had a wonderful holiday season...you deserve it! (((hugs)))

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I've travelled the distance from an Ivy League college to decades of enforced poverty--because I've needed to qualify for government health care in the U.S., since being diagnosed with lupus at the age of 23. I have a personal blog at http://beepbeep.livejournal.com that I've had so long I'm probably stuck with :) My other blogs are here on blogger...
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